|Fic that needs help
||[Apr. 2nd, 2005|10:41 pm]
The Hardline Tavern
|||||"Painless" - Mae||]|
I hope this doesn't come across as overly spammage to you all - 'specially since I'm a virtual unknown in these parts (I was a very light poster at the Hardline back around the pre/post-Revs fiasco... never wrote fic, just indulged in all of yours)... but anyway.
I have this... thing... called Life in Death going on at the moment, which I initially started just to explore Neo's character arc between M1 and Reloaded - but has since kind of grown in some weird ways. And while I believe a couple of you have already left some feedback at ff.net (which is very much appreciated), the general quality of criticism from people there is, well, not ideal - it's not telling me what I most want to know... what's working in this fic and what ain't!
So. This is my plea for help - if any of y'all have the time to give this thing a once-over and tell me what is rubbing you the wrong/right ways, I'd be forever indebted. I might even throw in an Oracle cookie.
Thanks, and much love. ;)
I was actually telling masakochan yesterday how I'm enjoying it. I hadn't put together that it was yours, though... I'm terrible at keeping track of people's handles.
But yeah, I wouldn't say there's really anything that's putting me off... I'm interested to see what you do with the warehouse bit. I really enjoy exposition on Neo's relationship to the machines/ role as the One.
Thanks! :) Yes, I do intend to touch upon that again sooner rather than later... I wanted to plant those seeds, because it seems to me even before Neo finds out the Oracle is a program, he already has lost some of the black-and-white view the rebels hold, both of the machines and his supposed path as the One. Like he knows there's more to it, he's just not quite sure what, yet. Glad to know that's interesting someone else, though.
Offhand, I also find it really intriguing that Neo never even tells Morpheus or anyone else what happened in the Architect's chamber, or that the Oracle's an AI - he keeps it all to himself. That weirded me out when I first saw Reloaded, how all he said was "It doesn't matter, I believed him."
Such a closed book, that Neo is. ;) Prolly part of why I love him.
Oh, definitely. After Reloaded, that really became my favorite aspect of the trilogy. So many blurry lines between artificial intelligence and human intelligence, and also how that entire revelation might affect Neo. I think it stems from my love of all things William Gibson... very cyberpunk. So yeah, I was excited when I saw that part of your fic.